Final Observation..MERDEKA SEPARUH

Wau... 9 weeks.. I made it . I can't believe it.~~
I survived!

Well my last observation ended on 2 September 2008. It was my supervisor who told me that he wants to observe me on that day.
It was suppose to be my literature but I have to change it to language lesson, else it would be unfair because I don't have any double periods lesson left on that week itself.

So this is what happened...
After third observation.. I decided I want to do reading. Why reading?
Reason no1: My second on reading was good..
Reason no2: I think I can handle reading lesson better than speaking lesson..
Reason no3: I can talk less ... I don't need to guide students till the end of my lesson.
Reason no4: When it comes to reading, it is a boring lesson, but at least, I played it safe.
Reason no5: I can handle problems arising from reading lesson .... I know what problems my students will have and I know how to solve it.

But the problem is.... it is so hard to find a reading topic on Science and Technology theme.
I am so lost.. I went back my home on Thursday.. so I have 4 days to prepare for my lesson before TUESDAY arrives. I kept telling myself things will turn out great..
I was so tension I can't do anything. Nothing pops out my mind... I search the net a lot of times for lesson plan, yet I find nothing.I am almost at the verge of breaking down...which I did again but just for a few minutes. I told myself.. wipe it off, get out of the house and I went to the nearest bookshop and spent a few minutes looking at form 1 workbooks on topic of science and technology. I bought a book.. just because it has a reading text on mobile phones. Just as a spare tyre in case I still don't find a good reading text on the theme of science and technology. It was a Saturday....

Then at night I browse the web again and again..and guess what!!!
Tada!! I found a website.. My saviour has come to me... it has a lot of lesson plan on science and technology cater to K1 to ... (what ever level they have. I don't know).
SO in the end, I took 2 different lesson plan topic which is almost the same. And I combine the reading topic into 1 reading text.

So I done my job in while.. Everything was done - halfway I mean.

Then , the show. This is what I expect me and my students do when I carried out the lesson in class.
Set:
Asks them about the internet... how they used the internet.. what programme they use.., what they do when they go online.... >> I got the answers I want and I lead them to the topic of the day EMAIL.

PRE: LEt's create an EMAIL
Ask them whether they wrote or sent emails before... [Yess.. No. Ok 50/50. Good , we are going to create 1 email together]
I paste the mahjong paper which look like the outline of an email inbox.
I gave them subject, date, message, sender and to ..They need to paste the information according subject, date , message, from and to.
Subject: Hi, I've got great news for you.
Date: September 1, 2008.
To: charlieyoung@yahoo.com
From: jyunrim@hanmail.com
Message: Dearest Charlie.. Check out our newest clothing line. CLICK HERE!

Now they created the email. I gave them a situation.. Let's say Charlie gets this email. And Charlie doesn't know who is the sender.. should he opens the mail? Should he click on the link provided...

Of course the answers given was not the one I expected lor.
Then , I told them.. actually... when you get an email from someone you don't know. "My advice is you don't open , or download anything from it. Moreover.. don't click on any link provided.. why... cause once you do it.. you may be link to another new site, asking you to buy something or.. you will get your computer infected with virus because most of the time, the link provided contains virus instructions ...OK.":-<

WHILE:
Then I gave them the reading text..asked them to read. Give them 10 minutes...walk around the class. see whether they are reading or sleeping...Then I asked them to read a loud in class.
Select students to read each paragraph.. and correct their pronunciations..
After each paragraph I asked them.. is there any words that you don't understand in that paragraph.. ?? So students raised hands, told me the words and I explained before moved on.
Finish reading and going through each paragraph everything... NO problem now.
Now asked them to complete the comprehension questions lor...{sorry lor, boringla I know.. but I must do things that I can handle}
Then I went around the class. Especially to those students who I think will even have a hard time understanding the text >.<
Explain in Malays.. show them where the answers come from....

Note: Actually I had another activity after reading comprehension, but somehow I knew my students cannot finish it on time. So.... :-)) I actually planned extras... I informed dr basil that I will only conduct that group activity when time permits.

Then almost time di...
POST:
Discusses the answers with students...
Selects students to answer...
Writes the answers on the board.. (why?.. so they get the correct tenses and spellings, so the weak students can copy the right answers >.< Oh god, forgive me......., but the main objective is so that students know where they went wrong]

Summarizes the lesson by asking questions... then asked them to hand in their worksheet.
End.
Relieved.
MERDEKA!! wahaha...

Dr Basil said I have IMPROVED MUCH.
Ask me to work harder when it comes to language..
Stop your carelessness...
Tada.. wonderful.
I think he is a good mood.
He ticks everything in the evaluation form...

3rd observation..

End of 1 week break.
Cried enough already.
No more tears anymore from Juayn. I decided from today onwards I am going to think positive and attract positive things to happen. I decide what will happen each day.

Well.. after the holidays break, after sick of crying... I decided that I am not going to focus on my weaknesses. If I can do it in the second observation, why not for the third and fourth.

I prepared a lesson plan on benefits of exercise.
I thought about it during the holidays, and still I find it not good enough.
After 2 days.... I check on the internet for lesson plans based on exercise.
And I found something, something which attracts my attention. I want to teach them something new.. the F.I.T.T approach in doing exercise.

So I revamp my lesson. (tis is what I did when dr Basil was there today)
In Set - I asked my students whether they enjoyed the holidays and how they had spent it.
In Pre - asked them whether they played during the holidays, then I told them to tell me more "Remember the lesson we learnt the weeks before the holidays...
We learned about healthy living, healthy food, exercise and games ..
SO today we are going to learn about the benefits of exercising..

Then I asked for types of exercise. Then continues with the general benefits of exercise.
Then I introduce F.I.T.T and how F.I.T.T is important when you are doing exercise.
Frequency - How many times a week?
Intensity - How hard?
Time - How long you exercise in a day?
Types of exercise - What you want to do?

After explanation, I gave them an example, let's say for me.
I am 23, I am a female, overweight and I am asthmatics .. So what exercise program you can design for me?
What can I do?
.Waits for answer... Shows them that they can use the list of exercise written on the board.
Basically.. I can exercise for 2 hrs..,, I can do swimming..

While- stage.
I asked them to work in groups of 4. I put them in groups..
Then I asked each representative from each group to come and collect an envelope that contains picture of an unfit individual.
My task was,I want them to design an exercise programme for the selected indiviual (weekly basis and using the F.I.T .T approach)
I showed them a sample of MY exercise program using F.I.T.T approach.. (as a reference for the blur case)
So after I distributed the papers, marker pens and magic pens... I walked around to assist them (I know they don't understand what I want them to do....most of them are unsure.. but I have to make them understand)
SO I went to each group and explained it to them be it in Malay or English.
Explain and explain until they get it... (PS: I realised something now. I didn't tell them to prepare an exercise programme on a weekly basis and that designed programme should make the selected individuals to slim down/lose weight!! - aiya - very kusut masai now)
But never mind, I make sure they understand. I guide them. I ask them questions.... so they are able to design the right one and not just simply coming out with any exercise program for fun.

The not-s0-good part:
My students took their time designing charts than coming up with an exercise programme. I have to keep telling them to draw and design later, do the exercise programme first.
I spent too much time in designing the charts.(..what to do. they prefer drawing than writing..)
I gave up my post so they can finish with their charts..
I asked them to stop their work and selected only 2 groups to present their work.. (not much time left)
When the boys were presenting , no one was listening, I had to catch just anyone to repeat the answers.. I did that for a few times.. for the 3 rd time>>> it works. <<< LUCKY.
Then I helped the presenter to build their sentences, I have to lead them, I have to show them.
Then I summarized my lesson and asked them to paste their work on the white softboard at the back of the class.

Personally, I think this one is a bit of mess up but overall SO SO.
At least Dr Basil says this..
Lesson are interesting...
You need to work on your time management skills..(didn't finish post ma -EXPECTED)
Spend time getting answers from your students..
Ask open ended questions.. just make them talk. You don't talk too much..
Ask more then link it to the lesson...
I see you are improving... [haha damn happy lor when he says this]
It's good you asked the students to put up their work. Something they can be proud of..
Find something for your students.. think on behalf of them. Find things which they are interested in...(not just about you teaching them new stuff... )

I realise I am not that bad lor.
I am OK la.
I don expect super excellente~~
I am no SAINT>.<
Now I am just thinking...
>>>>>Was that good? Why don't you tell me?<<<<<<

Rethinking about second observation...

When I think back about my second observation... at 1 point I am relieved to know that at least I have one good review.
I don't really know what was good about me on that day or maybe simply because I have bribe my students to behave well when my lecturer appears.

But I also I found out something about myself..
I have the confidence for my lesson that day...
I like the topic of my lesson...
I know I have something to talk about that particular topic...( I should choose topic that I will enjoy discussing in class,, when you are talking about one topic you like. you tend to talk with enthusiasm and you make less grammar errors or you don't really care what happen - you just love to talk about it, which I think is good for ME)
I am comfortable with that topic... (everything is line out in my mind)
Maybe that are the reasons I did well that day.

However, 1 good review is not enough for me....
I have been sleeping and getting myself busy by wrapping hampers and prizes which I have promised to give my students on my 10th week in La Salle.. (on Saturday and Sunday)
So basically I didn't think about any lessons or what to teach. I am so sick of it that I wish I could run away from this forever.
I met with my friends... I cried alone in my room, I cried when I talk to my friends. I told them everything... hopefully to get out all the sad viruses out of me.

I cry and cry and cry... and now I feel like I am a cry baby.
I don't know even know why I am crying sometimes...
I no longer have the energy to put a smile on my face just to show people I am fine...
I no longer crack jokes and talk like the Juayn I was before teaching practice...
I've become a more quiet person in search of hope,inspiration and guidance...
I have changed - which I hate so much about it.

I drag the days I need to be in school...
I feel so sick of it that I want to puke ... I hate the idea of sitting in the 'STUFFROOM' waiting for time to pass so that I can go back home.
I don't want any of these anymore. I don't want to repeat what is happening now.
I also realize that teaching is not my call.

But I have 3 more weeks in La Salle.. 2 more observation to go...
I don't know what to expect for my third observation...
I envy those who have completed their third observation...
I envy those who are down with 1 observation...
I envy those people that continue to strive on despite having a bad time in school...

Now ... I wish I can have all these people strengths.. A little bit of everything so that I can survive my last 3 weeks.

I am thankful for all the people who helped and supported me. (physically, emotionally, and spiritually)
You know who you are...Words can't really describe how I felt when you guys are around me and comforting me and keep on telling me everything will be fine.
"You are good Juayn.., You are ok Juayn... Don't think too much about what Dr Basil says.. Think of what you can do for your students... Do it because of your students and not to impress your lecturer, Juayn.. forget about your lecturer. You are learning... it's okay to make mistakes, Cry your heart out Juayn.. this is a process, even if you feel like giving up and tired, you can't run from it. This is a process that you must go through.. so let it be, Just go in do whatever you have in mind - GORENG SAJAla.. won't fail. They Fail you also they will have a hard time explaining..." and so many more advices that I remembered but fail to make a mark in my mind and heart.

I am so stubborn sometimes...

Second Observation

At last Dr Basil appeared..
I've been waiting for him to come observe me since 6th of August.
Then waited again till 11 August, he didn't appear , then I waited again till 13 August .
TADA!!! He came.
Haha actually when he came I know I am ready.
Somehow I knew I'm ready no matter what happens...
Although he looked at my lesson plan and corrected my grammar errors , I told myself it's ok. (I know I am weak in grammar - and he cares)
But all I know is I am ready to start my class with him sitting there.

So I went to the class.
He went and sat at the back of the class. He sat right next to Prem Kumar, one of my tallest students.
I don't pay much attention to him.

I started the lesson by asking what they learned on Monday.
Then I tell them something new..
Today we are going to do something related sports.
We are going to talk about games - also a form of exercise.
So I pick one students and show 1.. 2 .,.. shum..(the idea of JUS)
Then I showed them another one . I showed scissor paper stone.
I asked them what else....They told me more.

Good.
Now I told them about a new game 'Buwan-buwan'.
A game played by children in Philippines.
It's a game similar to Permainan Galah Panjang..
And I explained " how you can play the game buwan -buwan in a simpler language."

Then I gave them the vocabulary exercise..
Then I gave them reading comprehension text.
Then I discussed the answers with them
Then I sum up the lesson by asking them questions (which what Dr.. Basil wants)

Tada.. lesson end. (Just 35 minutes)

Sigh....
The things the review was good. The lesson went well.
I am happy for the first time in my life.
For once I proved to Dr Basil, I can do it too.
NO doubt sometimes my language is bad, but I think I didn't make a lot of grammar errors in class.

I want to thank all the people who have supported me and gave me the courage to continue.
I am happy..I am bless... for once I feel I can do something too.
But that is not enough.
I want to do more.
I hope I can do a double period lesson plan too as good.

Only God knows...

Teaching practice...

One day you leave the class happy, another day you leave the class feeling down, then the next day you leave feeling satisfied.

You never know what would happen next…

You would never know when your lecturer will come in; you live day to day with anticipation…

Sometimes you wish you had throw in the towel even before you started.

No matter you how hard you try, there will be something missing…

One day you may perform well, the second day you may suck. That’s why they say – “Life’s like a box of chocolate, you never know until you try each one of it”

What a poetic way to write about teaching practice…

After 4 weeks in school, and 3 weeks of teaching, I concluded that teaching is a very tiring and tasking job.

You don’t just teach, you need to figure out ways to improve your lesson, to make it easier for your students, to make it interesting, to make it fun, to get response, to create a flawless teaching impression and most importantly to improve yourself in all aspects.

To tell the truth, I find myself not applying all the methods taught by Mr.Lim in simulated teaching.

I try some of it with my students...

Still they don’t behave in class.

I don’t say I am a very good teacher, but I know despite my so –so language proficiency, I am trying to impress my students all the time.

I try the silence treatment…. (Works only for 5 minutes… then students go bla bla bla)

I try catching students who talk to repeat what their friends said… (Works! But I will waste my 10-15 minutes doing that)

I try shuffling their seats… (I’ll say it works 50% only…they are so restless)

When I talk they talk. No respect for me… (Maybe teacher Juayn is too kind!)

How to make a lesson that will work for students who cannot even comprehend

“I think I like….because….”

“ I like to eat….. because….”

So teach language or teach content or teach grammar? (Does it matter? if they can’t even make a 5 words sentence in English)

They can read, but do they know the meaning?

Don’t use difficult words…make it easy for them (which is very hard lor for me).

Haiyah…headache…. How to solve the problems above?

Take all of your wasted honor.
Every little past frustration.
Take all of your so called problems,
Better put 'em in quotations.

Walkin' like a one man army,
Fightin' with the shadows in your head.
Livin' up the same old moment
Knowin' you'd be better off instead

Have no fear for givin' in.
Have no fear for giving over.
You better know that in the end
It's better to say too much, than never to say what you need to say again.

Even if your hands are shaking,
And your faith is broken.
Even as the eyes are closin',
Do it with a heart wide open.

Above are the lyrics from the song by John Mayer- Say what you need to say.

I think it is inspirational and that’s what we are going through now.

I hope whatever we do in teaching practice, we do it with a heart wide open.

We may feel like crying…giving up… but that’s Ok.